Hope is a major bitch
well, alot has happened....i wish it hadn't.
Zues went to the vets from tuesday-thursday, when we brought him home. Found out on wednesday that he has FIP (feline infectious paratanitious), an often deadly virus. Very few cats have been recorded of getting over it. WE broguht him home on thursday, and i stayed home on friday to spend a little more time with him. Tory came over at 6pm, which was nice, and zues pirked up when he heard her. We were both sad to see her go.
She even hugged me and my mom, in a row. Breaking a few personal hugging records for herself.
The appoitnment had been set for saturday, october 15th at 1pm, and so me and mom thought, why bother with his medicane, he hates it and its not going to do him much good anyways. While, an hour before we were ment totakae him in and euthinized (nicest thing we could do for zues, he started to eat, drink and use his litter box all by himself!!!!! Things he hadn't done in about a week to a week and a half. So, we called and cancelled the appointment, and zues was just bounding wth energy and happyness. It was great.
Later that night (last night ironically, seems so long ago), mom, dad, pam and pams friend Devin went to the Romeo and Juliet play, put on by alberta ballet, pams ballet studio place (i was susposto go, but i frnakly told my mom that there was no way in hell i was leaving zues, and they could just go without me). While, mom gave him medicane before she left, cause he was getting hot again, and later he threw up, and only a small amount of the food he had eaten came up to. (good sign).
While, today, cause our vets is closed on sundays, we went to the emergency clinic in clagary, because zues did not look good. They told us quiet frankly there was little they could do, and we could eaither end it or we could hope he was comfortable for the next few days and end it. The sounds he had made in the car on the way there, were like faint echos of himself.
Both mom and the doctor looked at me. they ahd been takling, but i hadn't heard them. It was my choice they said, my choice. I looked down into his golden eyes, and saw the love, the memories and the pain he was going through at that moment in time. When they had weighted him, they said he was about 12 pounds. HE was between 6 and 7 pounds when he was heathly.
I had to sit in the car while they did it. I felt like i was abandoning him, leaving him in that unfamiliar place, to go to somewhere where he has never been before. Mom was there though, and just sitting there, i could feel his pain and his love, and it was so much. I called tory wile ihad waited. I knew she'd want to know. I had called her saurday, and she was really happy to hear that he was alright and doing good. i think i heard her cry just alittle when i told her the news today. It was barely after 2 when he left us.
Hes getting cremaited in his favorite blanket; the tigerstripped (approiate eh?) blanket that we had taken him home from tory's, when he was so small, and now that will accompany his physcial body out of this world. They said we could pick him up in 3-5 days at our vets, where they would send him.
I am wearing his tag around my neck, on a goldy chane. i had his collar around my ancle, and it fit like it was ment to be there, without any adjuctiments from when he had worn it. The sound of his bell (on the collar), with everystep, gave me false hope and caused realisty to come crashing down again. Its on mybookshelf, and i am going to make a palce for it to sit, undisterbed and in the mist of everything.
Mom offered to clean out all the cat stuff from out of my room. I'm letting her. I walked into my room and i just stared. I couldn't stay in ther for to long. Jazzy was sleeping on my bed, and she looked up and me and made one of the saddest sounds i have ever heard to use. ALot like the sounds zues was making in the car ride there. On the car ride back, i heard those sounds, and before i knew it, we were home. I still am wondering if i blinked.
It feels so wierd. I stood under a scortching hot shower, got dressed in wamr clothing, and had a large thing of hot hot chocolate, and i still feel cold...not even batman can solve this one...
Zues went to the vets from tuesday-thursday, when we brought him home. Found out on wednesday that he has FIP (feline infectious paratanitious), an often deadly virus. Very few cats have been recorded of getting over it. WE broguht him home on thursday, and i stayed home on friday to spend a little more time with him. Tory came over at 6pm, which was nice, and zues pirked up when he heard her. We were both sad to see her go.
She even hugged me and my mom, in a row. Breaking a few personal hugging records for herself.
The appoitnment had been set for saturday, october 15th at 1pm, and so me and mom thought, why bother with his medicane, he hates it and its not going to do him much good anyways. While, an hour before we were ment totakae him in and euthinized (nicest thing we could do for zues, he started to eat, drink and use his litter box all by himself!!!!! Things he hadn't done in about a week to a week and a half. So, we called and cancelled the appointment, and zues was just bounding wth energy and happyness. It was great.
Later that night (last night ironically, seems so long ago), mom, dad, pam and pams friend Devin went to the Romeo and Juliet play, put on by alberta ballet, pams ballet studio place (i was susposto go, but i frnakly told my mom that there was no way in hell i was leaving zues, and they could just go without me). While, mom gave him medicane before she left, cause he was getting hot again, and later he threw up, and only a small amount of the food he had eaten came up to. (good sign).
While, today, cause our vets is closed on sundays, we went to the emergency clinic in clagary, because zues did not look good. They told us quiet frankly there was little they could do, and we could eaither end it or we could hope he was comfortable for the next few days and end it. The sounds he had made in the car on the way there, were like faint echos of himself.
Both mom and the doctor looked at me. they ahd been takling, but i hadn't heard them. It was my choice they said, my choice. I looked down into his golden eyes, and saw the love, the memories and the pain he was going through at that moment in time. When they had weighted him, they said he was about 12 pounds. HE was between 6 and 7 pounds when he was heathly.
I had to sit in the car while they did it. I felt like i was abandoning him, leaving him in that unfamiliar place, to go to somewhere where he has never been before. Mom was there though, and just sitting there, i could feel his pain and his love, and it was so much. I called tory wile ihad waited. I knew she'd want to know. I had called her saurday, and she was really happy to hear that he was alright and doing good. i think i heard her cry just alittle when i told her the news today. It was barely after 2 when he left us.
Hes getting cremaited in his favorite blanket; the tigerstripped (approiate eh?) blanket that we had taken him home from tory's, when he was so small, and now that will accompany his physcial body out of this world. They said we could pick him up in 3-5 days at our vets, where they would send him.
I am wearing his tag around my neck, on a goldy chane. i had his collar around my ancle, and it fit like it was ment to be there, without any adjuctiments from when he had worn it. The sound of his bell (on the collar), with everystep, gave me false hope and caused realisty to come crashing down again. Its on mybookshelf, and i am going to make a palce for it to sit, undisterbed and in the mist of everything.
Mom offered to clean out all the cat stuff from out of my room. I'm letting her. I walked into my room and i just stared. I couldn't stay in ther for to long. Jazzy was sleeping on my bed, and she looked up and me and made one of the saddest sounds i have ever heard to use. ALot like the sounds zues was making in the car ride there. On the car ride back, i heard those sounds, and before i knew it, we were home. I still am wondering if i blinked.
It feels so wierd. I stood under a scortching hot shower, got dressed in wamr clothing, and had a large thing of hot hot chocolate, and i still feel cold...not even batman can solve this one...
posted by dragon's voice at 2:27 PM
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